The Hounds of Hell

I was having a drink the other day with Natalie an old sailing buddy, she owned two large dogs and she made a point to walk them very early every morning. I would sometimes join her with my two dogs if I was home.

“I’ve been going out on the fire trails on the north side of town,” Natalie said. “But the last couple of times I have been shadowed by a pack of dogs. I had to put my two on their leads as they wanted to chase them.”

Just then a bloke on the stool next to us broke in to our conversation.

“You want to be careful, mate! I live up that way and I lost one of my dogs,” he said.

“I spoke to a  woman with three work dogs, she told me she had to run for the car with a pack of about 30 dogs after her, she said she only just slammed the door in the snout of a huge black dog that jumped up at the window snarling and spitting foam all over the glass.”

The bloke turned away and got back into his drink.

I had a few more … which always helps me make silly decisions and talk big.

“Hey, I wouldn’t mind seeing these packs. Do you feel like showing me where you saw them?”

Natalie didn’t like the idea and it took some time to talk her around.

Early next morning Natalie picked me up with her four wheel drive, and with the dogs in the back we set off.

“What’s in the ruck sack?

“You don’t want to know.”

“It smells!”

Natalie didn’t ask any more. When we had driven deep into the timber, Natalie stopped the car.

“It was around here that I saw them and by the look of our dogs they must smell them.”

I was searching the scrub around us and couldn’t see anything.

“Let’s get out and have a look around. Don’t worry we won’t go far from the vehicle.”

Seeing Natalie looking nervous.

“Come on! I have the cattle prod we’ll be ’right.”

We got out and started to walk along the trail.

“Just a little further. Just around this corner.”

“Chaos, what’s that over in the trees?” Natalie said pointing at a huge black shape lurking in the shadows.

“It’s the dog the bloke at the pub told us about. Hurry up! Time to get back to the car.”

“I don’t think we can. The pack is all around. See they’re circling behind us.”

“Don’t worry just keep walking towards the car. I have the cattle prod turned on.”

When we came around the corner I saw that we would be cut off before we reached the vehicle. The vehicle was rocking and our dogs were baying to get out.

“I don’t think we’re going to make it, Chaos! If you have any ideas let’s hear them.”

“When you get to the car make sure the dogs don’t escape. I’m going to stop here. Go now!”

While saying this I opened the ruck sack and started to pull out handfuls of rotting meat and proceeded to throw it as far out into the scrub as I could. I could see that most of the pack had broken away and were hunting the offal.

“Come on Chaos!” Natalie screamed. “Behind you! That black bastard is nearly on you.”

I swung around and just as the dog leaped into the air coming straight at my throat. I hit him full in the nose with the cattle prod on high. The dog swung away nearly putting me down. Out of nowhere the bull bar of the car hit the dog and before it could recover I was in the car.

“Let’s get the hell out of here, head for my place.”

“That’s the last time you get me involved in your adventures. I’d rather be sailing – it’s safer!”

Stuffed Mushrooms with Pork

Ingredients
300g minced pork
300g fresh large field mushrooms
½ teaspoon chopped garlic
½ teaspoon chopped ginger
½ teaspoon sugar
1 tablespoon soy sauce
1 teaspoon of cornflower
4 finely chopped water chestnuts
sesame oil
fresh chopped parsley and coriander

Cooking
Mix all the ingredients together in a bowl except the mushrooms, oil and parsley. Take the stems off the mushrooms and spoon some mixture into the cap. Wipe a little sesame oil around an oven dish, place in the mushrooms and cover the dish with foil. Steam in a moderate oven for 30 minutes. Serve with rice and stir fried vegetables, sprinkle the parsley and coriander over them.